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To New Beginnings…

glass

It has been a while since my last post. This year has been quite the roller coaster and I was definitely in for the ride of my life.  And what a ride it’s been!  I have made some huge decisions in the last few months, but looking back at the last decade of my life, every single thing that happened was building up to this exact moment. Have you ever felt like you were on the edge of a cliff? Unsure whether to let go, fearing what lies beneath; yet knowing that you could not hold on forever? Well, that’s been me for the last two years.  Petrified of change, but knowing that if I didn’t change something then I would go crazy.

Letting Bruce Go.

About a week ago I bid a very heart-wrenching goodbye to my baby – Bruce. Being a very integral part of my life, it broke my heart to see him go. While being one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make, it was also time for me to move on, no matter how difficult it was.

For the clueless, Bruce was my first car. (Yes, I got that attached to a piece of machinery so there!). And if you’re wondering why a he and not a she, there is no space in my life for two divas and I am definitely a diva.

I still remember the first time I laid eyes on him. It was a yard in Mombasa and the pictures I had been sent did him no justice; the minute I saw him, I just knew – he and I were made for each other. The drive back cemented our relationship and I knew I had found a gem. He represented so many firsts for me other than just being my first car. He brought true independence into my life which, up to that point had always been subjected to limitations of cab guys and public transport. He also brought a profound sense of responsibility because I was now literally responsible for his maintenance and upkeep which made me seriously re-evaluate my priorities. Owning him opened up my world from its previous shell to numerous opportunities and possibilities that I had never even considered before. So when I say giving him up was like the end of an era, I truly mean it.

car

As I struggled with the decision to sell him, I was overwhelmed by memories of the journey that he and I have been on for four years. Bruce literally brought Fun into my life! I don’t think I was a very fun person before to be quite honest. With him I indulged my travel genie and every other weekend was an opportunity to just drive and explore this amazing country with my fun-loving friends in tow on some very random road trips.

On the few occasions that I was in town I became the default chauffeur for my family and friends to run errands, drop people off, provide transport etc. Even at parties or while out partying I was the default driver and none of my friends ever had to worry about taking a cab home. Thanks to these numerous trips I became a rather adept driver and even earned the nickname “Sheka Meta”. (I really want to believe that the name was based on skill and not just speedJ).

Bruce represented so many things for me. Reliability and dependability – I knew I could always count on him no matter what. He never failed me, not once, not even a flat tyre. And trust me, I went all over this country with him! He represented independence – I finally didn’t have to be at the mercy of other people or psv’s to get around. Most importantly he taught me that opportunities were there for the taking, if I could just start believing in myself and just grab them without constantly questioning if I was capable. Before I bought him I never believed I could afford a car; yet the amounts of money I splurged every weekend were astronomical. All I did was rearrange my priorities and boom! I had Bruce.

Just like all things in life, when he had taught me all that he needed to, it was time to let him go. I did hang on to him in denial for as long as I could, just the same way we hang on to things or people in our life who have served their purpose but we refuse to let them go. In letting Bruce go, I acknowledged that I was simply moving on to the next level in my life which was ultimately inevitable.

hoard

How many things are you holding on to right now that you need to let go off? Is it your job? Is it time you changed careers or started a business? Is it a person, a friend who once was in sync with you but is now dragging you down or holding you back? What are you hoarding in your life right now that you need to spring clean? Many of us are often reluctant to move on because we tend to be creatures of habit and enjoy our comfort zones much longer than necessary. It’s important to pick the lessons and learn from them and then move on after that. Do not stay on for longer than necessary and know when to walk away.

Adios Bruce. I will always treasure the memories.

fun